you stole my heart

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Quote: "I will cook 4 u nasi goreng all my life b" - 23/11/2005, 07:30:32 PM
it just reminds me of the good old days.

PMS mode (cranky, mood swings, gibberish, depression) + stomach cramp,backache = heated argument

i guess tt explains why it happened. but it could have been avoided if tt someone had spared some understanding or perhaps just a lil of giving in by being a cool cucumber.

:: ffy 01:07PM ::

when the elder question the sister

24th May 2006 says:
tak berbual ngan wan ke?
ffy says:
tahhh ngah gaduh ngan dier
24th May 2006 says:
ler...
24th May 2006 says:
tak abis2
ffy says:
hahahaha
ffy says:
mmg takkan abis
ffy says:
menyampah
24th May 2006 says:
tapi gaduh2 pun kekal sampai sekarang
ffy says:
hahahaha
ffy says:
tahhh....pelik

when the friend said i have an indian blood. wtf???

R|SA says:
kau ngan ida ada darah mama eh aku rasa.. ina dutch.. aku cam nyonya.. hahhaa
R|SA says:
but serius la budak tu lawa la
R|SA says:
hkhkaa
ffy says:
lawa kann..aku geram siak ngan dier (referring to my darling niece)
R|SA says:
(missing emoticons)
ffy says:
umah aku slalu sunyi kalau takde dier
R|SA says:
(missing emoticons) kawin la ngan wan..
R|SA says:
bole apat anak
ffy says:
uhhhh plssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Subject: I love you for no reason

X : Why do you like me..? Why do you love me?

Y : I can't tell the reason.. but I really like you..

X : You can't even tell me the reason... how can you say you like me? How can you say you love me?

Y : I really don't know the reason, but I can prove that I love you.

X : Proof? No! I want you to tell me the reason. My friend's boyfriend can tell her why heloves her.. but not you!

Y : Ok..ok!!! Erm... because you are beautiful, because your voice is sweet, because you are caring, because you are loving, because you are thoughtful, because of your smile, because of your every movements.

X felt very satisfied with her boyfriend's answer. Unfortunately, a few days later, X met with an accident and became comma. Y then placed a letter by her side, and here is the content:
............................

Darling,
Because of your sweet voice that I love you... Now can you talk? No! Therefore I cannot love you.

Because of your care and concern that I like you..Now that you cannot show them, therefore I cannot love you.

Because of your smile, because of your every movements that I love you.. Now can you smile? Now can you move? No, therefore I cannot love you...

If love needs a reason, like now, there is no reason for me to love you anymore.

Do love need a reason? NO!

Therefore, I still love you... And love doesn't need a reason.

"Sometimes the best and the most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen, cannot be touched, but can be felt in the heart "

Subject: Kecantikkan lelaki...Kegagahan wanita....

Kecantikkan Lelaki

Kecantikan seorang lelaki bukan kepada rupa fizikal tetapi pada murni rohani. Lelaki yang cantik,adalah:-

1) Lelaki yang mampu mengalirkan airmata untuk ingatan
2) Lelaki yang sedia menerima segala teguran
3) Lelaki yang memberi madu,setelah menerima racun
4) Lelaki yang tenang dan lapang dada
5) Lelaki yang baik sangka
6) Lelaki yang tak pernah putus asa
Kecantikan lelaki berdiri di atas kemuliaan hati. Seluruh kecantikan yang ada pada Nabi Muhammad adalah kecantikan yang sempurna seorang lelaki.

Kegagahan Wanita

Kegagahan seorang wanita bukan kepada pejal otot badan,tetapi pada kekuatan perasaan. Perempuan yang gagah,adalah:-

1) Perempuan yang tahan menerima sebuah kehilangan
2) Perempuan yang tidak takut pada kemiskinan
3) Perempuan yang tabah menanggung kerinduan setelah ditinggalkan
4) Perempuan yang tidak meminta-minta agar di penuhi segala keinginan.
Kegagahan perempuan berdiri di atas teguh iman. Seluruh kegagahan yang ada pada Khadijah adalah kegagahan sempurna bagi seorang perempuan.

Monday, November 28, 2005

i vomitted at 2+am.
i slept for only 2hours.
i had cinone eyes and an empty stomach for the last 24 hours.
my chest is burning and my throat really hurts.
my whole body is totally weak.
and i almost slipped and fainted in the shower this morning at 6am.

the reason of depression and resorting to an uncivilised act.

Sunday, November 27, 2005

if only you were the water,you would have save the situation. YOU WOULD. TRUST ME.
and TRY FITTING YOURSELF INTO MY SHOES.
tooo BAD you CANT and you WONT.

any last words for me?

Sunday, November 13, 2005

neoprint stickers and cards freaks back then; kental faces

sending him off on the 2nd week of his recruit days

5pm knocked off from CT's house at Jurong West. if i had known the rest would be late, Naddy Nad Nad and I would have stayed longer at tt someone's house. and I wouldn't get a sudden blow from the msg for no reason. in fact ive already informed tt someone on tuesday tt saturday and sunday will be my raya visitings in the west and east areas with the coursemates. and again the same msg was sent out yesterday morning tt i will be going to the house even if tt someone will not be at home. furthermore i had plans in the afternoon, thus the reason i went earlier and left in a hurry. in fact my purpose was to visit the elders and i was there for 45mins to an hour. i came down with a really sincere heart after much thinking. but things just had to happen. *siiiggghhhh*. Naddy Nad Nad was already kind enough to accompany me there and we really had to make a move at 3.30pm when we were supposed to be at CT house by tt time. if we had no other plans, we would have stayed a little while longer for sure.

2am sharp i reached home from raya visits in the west and north areas. chaotic, hectic and full stomach. thank gdness we hitched a ride. guess this will be the 1st and the last raya as a group; 16 of us (11 ladies + 5 guys) and managed to cover 9 houses. doubt i will be able to make it this afternoon to cover the east areas as im tooooo tired, not in the mood and im wondering as to whom will send me home after the outing. im toooo upset to sleep though im fucking sleepy. im soooo affected by whatever tt had happened. i really wish i will lose my memory. yessss.. im wishing for tt so as to lead a brand new life and forget those tt had left scars on me.

let me have a smoke 1st to calm me down.

:: ffy 03:20am ::

Friday, November 11, 2005

i had a fcuking splitting headache yesterday. my head was fucking heavy tt i just felt like fucking banging it against the wall. it must be due to the fucking excessive cryings. added to it, i havent had any fucking meals since morning. honestly, i should have just done what i had fucking intended during that fucking massive argument on fasting month.

i waited 4 fucking hours in my fucking raya clothes; from the sun shine till it was raining cats and dogs, the plan was still fucking undecided. i was fucking looking forward for yesterday outing come what may. it was already fucking planned before hand and it just had to fucking backfire. someone had to be fucking cranky, not in the fucking mood and fucking lifeless yesterday. and it blardy hell affected me. there were too many fucking reasons for the fucking plan to fucking falter. i was fucking geared up to go to the house and having to wait for 4 fucking hours for that particular someone to plan and get ready was enough to kill my fucking entire mood. i just dont know what that someone wants. i woke up, shower and got ready within an hour just for the sake of yesterday but i was fucking dissappointed of the outcome. i always fucking took into considerations of that someone's fucking well being and other fucking factors whenever there were fucking plans for outings yet tt someone just have to fucking smack me right onto my face with fucking assumptions and be unappreciative.

Enough of me being fucking tolerance, fucking nice and fucking soft. tt particular someone don't seem to reflect on the wrongdoings. and the fucking words uttered were just for the sake of keeping me shut. promises are made to be broken? why must it be me who's at the fucking losing end? i kept asking what am i lacking and what else have i not done? where my fucking mistakes lie? im lost for words and i can't find the fucking answers.

yesterday was really such a fucking dissappointment tt without much hesitation, i changed my raya clothes and armed with a fucking pack of Viceroy Menthol Lights in hand, fucking swollen eyes, i left the house in the fucking evening to seek solace. i really felt fucking terrible inside. there was no fucking way tt i could hold back my tears anymore. im feeling fucked up right now. i guess the other plans will be fucking spoilt given this situation. there was no fucking raya outing yesterday, today i will fucking go wherever the fucking feet drag me to, 2mrw will be the all girls house visits in the west area, sun will be the fucking day tt i hope it will cheer me up, mon will be Naddy Nad Nad birthday and i doubt i will get to watch the fucking movie in the VIP seats.

please fucking tell me what else you want from this fucking bitch. for what this someone fucking did a year ago, this someone should make up for all the fucking mistakes. but tt someone made it as if im the one who did all those fucking shits. im fucking tired for now. i need a fucking break. i don't know when will tt someone realise the fucking pain tt ive been through. im not asking for any fucking returns. ive said my fucking piece for now.

now i need a fucking shower before i fucking plan where to head to. the 2 makciks (Naddy Nad Nad and Cam) should be on the beach tanning now. but it's gonna rain. tan ke hape. basah kuyup ade ah.

:: ffy 12:24pm ::

Thursday, November 10, 2005

before

after

before

after

i just love the sanctuary now. cosy, in comfort, romantic ambience and im just loving it.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

sunday was a GREAT day.

monday went recce at sentosa for the amazing race on the 13th Dec. scorching hot indeed. but these were a breather.

after which, walked a lil at Harbour Front and bought an Adidas sling beg which caught my eyes. just cant resist the temptation of window-shopping.

tuesday was a long day spent outside. accompanied Naddy Nad Nad to Bedok as she wanted to highlight her hair, to town where she did her manicure & pedicure (dah mcm tai-tai), we shopped at Forever 21 and had Mud pie and drinks at Coffee Club Somerset. bloated stomach but happy faces. romantic habis.

wednesday was spent at home and catch up some sleep. had a terrible headache.

thursday to next monday will be damn hectic. toooo many plans. house visitings with the malay gals to west & east areas on cars during the weekends, probably to his house on thursday, friday reserved for unforeseen circumstances; was told tt his mum will be going for an op, monday will be watching Harry Potter at Cineleisure as he had won VIP movie tickets courtesy of P10 and i shall not spill anymore details for now. *lips sealed*.

:: ffy 01:07am ::

Saturday, November 05, 2005

i just discovered tt ive lost 4kg; 51kg-47kg. its either the fasting month, school or the rship tt skinned me alive. im FREAKING happy tt i lost weight. no wonder i feel lighter now and is not weight concious. whoever tt person is who said im FAT, im gonna *sampiong* you. tts just a dirty tactic alright to make me FREAK out. *grinz*.

i guess this will be the last raya tt i will receive my fair share of green packets. yesssss all my relatives were GENEROUS. those who did not, i forced them to fork out cos im still a student; i can show them my pass. haha. even mum was on my side. 2 days of house visitings, i received $104. its better than nothing. at least it covers the expense of my shopping list for the kuihs' ingredients. more than enough. next year onwards, my turn to give out those green packets. my lil cousins, nieces and nephews will be jumping for joy. and i just love the drop dead outgoing and chaotic relatives of mine. laughters filled the air 24/7 whenever we meet up. be it during family member's wedding, kenduri, outing or raya. we would never run out of antics or jokes cos seriously, there are bunch of clowns who will entertain us. my aunts, uncles, cousins and grandma will all be in full force to create the chaotic ambience. we are part of the game. even the in-laws who just got married into the family will make themselves feel at home. the pakcik (bf) can vouch for this.

:: ffy 03:12am ::

some overdue pictures; 29th October Iftar Session with the Mly gals at Taka Seoul Garden. hopefully this will not be the first and the last of such outing. the rest; too lazy to upload.

step charlies angels plak ni 3 ekor

the greedy us

after math; i look fat in this picture

1/2 of the malay cohort

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

i made 200 of this; choco flakes. 100 for mum, 50 each for aunt & his mum. *sakit pinggang*.

i used the leftover chocoloate to make 120 of choco crispies; 70 for mum, 25 each for aunt & his mum.

i made all the chocolate kuihs in 13hrs, with a lil help from mum and lil bro. mum helped to layout the cases on the patty tin and clear the mess while the lil bro helped to fill the chocolate and rainbow toppings. *tak sia2 ade adek, walaupun lelaki. bley gak harap*. he also helped to cut out the greaseproof papers so that i can use them in layering the kuihs. like that must give extra for green packet huh?? everyone in the family is all caught up with their roles at home.
mum - ironed and hanged the curtains, did the flowering, changed our bedsheets, spring cleaning..
dad - painted our rooms (master bedroom & mine) to another colour; *GREAT*. now ive got the colour tt ive wanted, he mopped & vacuumed the entire house, refurnished the furniture in the whole house..
me - made kuihs, cleaned the room, wiped the sofa set..
bro - cleared his unwanted stuffs, cleaned his room, painted his room (mind u,he's only 14), helped me & mum..

despite the busy-ness in the hs every year and throughout my 21 years of living, this is the very 1st raya that im not looking forward to. school assignment is 1 of the reasons. this year i did less cleaning up for Raya, thanks to hectic school schedule. 2nd day Raya will have to return school to submit EdPysch 1 essay. i wonder if i will still get green packets from the aunts. *thick skin*. cos advance pay is running low for now. like this, eat the kuihs till 12th Dec. and ground myself at home. i'd rather get pay on the 12th Nov instead of 28th October. *siggghhhhh*. hopefully bonus will make up for all this.

now am still pondering if i shld go Geylang at night just for the sake of the cheap sale & last minute shopping or go JB in the morning as what the pakcik (bf) has just suggested. i shall head to bed at this very minute so that i can wake up in a while to work on my assignment. i can't wait last minute cos i wldnt want to celebrate Raya worrying of my incomplete school work.

:: ffy 1252pm ::